Youtube Monkey was Contracted to Design NHS COVID-19 Tracing App

It has emerged that “Miles” the Monkey, the Youtube employee responsible for the worldwide crash of the video streaming website, was also awarded the contract by the UK government to design the NHS COVID-19 contact-tracing app.

Documents released today show that the brains behind the base design for the infamous NHS COVID-19 contact-tracing app was in fact the same employee responsible for the maintenance of Youtube, Gmail and Google docs; all of which suffered severe network outages today.

The employee is named “Miles the monkey” and was headhunted by Google during a company trip to San Diego Zoo, California. Interest was sparked when Google owner Larry Page was charmed by Miles’ ability to fling his faeces at visitors with outstanding accuracy.

UK Government tender documents released show that Miles is the majority shareholder and owner of “BANANA plc”, the company awarded a £35m contract to build the contact-tracing app for the NHS.

UK Health Secretary, Matt Hancock MP said that the company’s application was clearly head and shoulders above the rest.